In a follow up to my farewell post on TechieIO.com, I wanted to expand a bit more on something I learned about myself recently. An imperfection.
My environment significantly influences my ability to focus and foster creativity, a feeling I’m sure many can relate to. It’s not just about seeking a quiet space away from distractions like children; rather, it’s about crafting the perfect atmosphere that enables me to connect deeply with myself. For example, I’ve found that maintaining a meticulously organized and functional desk is essential for my productivity. Without a properly set up workspace, I struggle to initiate the thought process necessary for writing.
I’m quite particular about my writing environment, which sometimes feels like a hurdle I should easily overcome. I found myself fixated on the idea that I needed the perfect physical setting to write effectively. This fixation ultimately led to what felt like writer’s block, or so I thought.
For more context, I’ve definitely struggled since 2019 to write.
While I had time to “reflect” in the hospital recently, I realized that from 2009-2019, I gave 110% of myself to an industry that nearly sucked me dry. I know I sacrificed family time, time with my kids, my health and even reasonable time for myself along the way. I thought I was doing something to help the “greater good”, and I was. The greater good in my mind, has always been associated to helping people in big ways. In 2009, I started an e-cigarette business which later became known as 7’s Electronic Cigarettes or just 7’s. A business which helped inspire me to improve, create and engineer potentially life-saving products. Products that could save literally, millions of lives.
While I was “in the industry”, I couldn’t say things publicly like “electronic cigarettes save lives” out loud … That’s technically against the FDA’s rules, if you’re marketing or selling anyway (which I am no longer doing).
At the time and around when I started the business, I was driven to make electronic cigarettes better and safer to use. The first versions I came across had such a high defective rate (sometimes up to 25%).
Witnessing this first hand, it appeared there wasn’t a way I could see the industry succeeding without significant design changes. I saw so much potential because I knew that, if this was perfected, and I mean truly perfected, it would be possible to help anyone completely quit smoking tobacco cigarettes.
Smoking was an issue in my family growing up and I had a strong belief that smoking contributed to the deaths of my mother, aunt, and grandmother all before I was in my early 20’s.
The “7’s” part of my life, is likely to generate the most amount of stories for this blog. That is just because business wise, it was certainly the most emotionally charged roller-coaster of my life. It was a business that took off well into the millions while I was only in my early 20’s. Landing me on multiple news networks, from print and radio to national TV interviews. I had offices in a handful of countries and traveled the world for business frequently.
But also. It was some of the most stressful events of my life that I believe may have left me stuck in fight or flight mode for years thereafter. Why? Well, we had many haters in the industry. From the FDA, FAA, US Customs & Border Control, Banks, Online Retailers at least 9 out of the top 10 tobacco companies breathing down my neck one way or another.
This was all despite the huge success I was having with helping real people quit smoking cigarettes. Not to mention, other “big brand” or gorilla experiences you’re not ever ready for. Companies similar to or such as RJ Reynolds or even Jack Daniels knocking on your door with unjust trademark issues wanting to take your hard work away from you, with the intentions to keep it all for themselves.
At one point, believe it or not, PayPal tried to “capture” my merchant account funds (5 figures worth), in an attempt to pressure us to shut down.
In each and every battle, I prevailed. Including with having PayPal return the money that was taken from me, 6 months later. Even Chase Bank and I were involved in a large dispute I ultimately won, forcing them to forgive nearly $50k in unfair interest charges.
I was additionally pressured by pharmaceutical companies who sold somewhat competing products similar to Chantix.
Between a good friend of mine, his business and from the “7’s” business revenue, we jointly spent roughly $100,000+ out of our own pockets on press releases. This was to combat the misinformation that was put out there by lobbyists whom were funded by anti-smoking groups, pharmaceutical companies or even states. Anti-smoking organizations are supposed to support products that help you quit smoking, not shame them.
The truth is, it despite all of the theories circling the internet. I came to the conclusion that it all primarily came down to the “Tobacco Master Settlement Agreement” from 1998 as per below.
The Tobacco Master Settlement Agreement (MSA) was entered on November 23, 1998, originally between the four largest United States tobacco companies (Philip Morris Inc., R. J. Reynolds, Brown & Williamson and Lorillard – the “original participating manufacturers”, referred to as the “Majors”) and the attorneys general of 46 states. The states settled their Medicaid lawsuits against the tobacco industry for recovery of their tobacco-related health-care costs. In exchange, the companies agreed to curtail or cease certain tobacco marketing practices, as well as to pay, in perpetuity, various annual payments to the states to compensate them for some of the medical costs of caring for persons with smoking-related illnesses. The money also funds a new anti-smoking advocacy group, called the Truth Initiative, that is responsible for such campaigns as Truth and maintains a public archive of documents resulting from the cases.
– Wikipedia
So, later on the problem with this (and after e-cigarettes became a big deal) is that no states predicted a product like an electronic cigarette could ever exist to threaten or replace Tobacco. So essentially, the master settlement agreement is what incentivizes states to directly protect the tobacco business because they receive a cut hidden in “taxes” from every pack of cigarettes sold. A tax that didn’t apply to electronic cigarettes.
But wait. That’s not all. The states had leveraged this projected income stream and took major loans out against it many years before e-cigarettes existed. Ultimately handcuffing the states to the debt. This was due to the decreasing income from the “tobacco tax kickbacks” via the master settlement agreement intended to repay this debt. Electronic cigarettes were a significant factor in the decreasing tobacco sales overall and therefore significantly cut into the income stream which was intended to pay back these state loans!
This created a nightmare for public health, because as per usual, money became more important to the government than the people. So this was the primary factor as to why so many states were oppositional to electronic cigarettes or e-cigarettes at first, and along came the “it’s harmful for you conspiracies”. Not because they were “unsafe” in comparison to cigarettes. (Disclaimer: Not all e-cigarettes are created equal and some are safer than others.) From the state to the federal level, there was pressure put on companies and even banks to step in while rules or regulations were being developed under a guise to protect the public’s best interest, but from the hidden truth. Rules that also only seem to ultimately favor big tobacco. Simply because, it cut into their bottom line. Tobacco sales were dipping and even more so once electronic cigarettes became much more main stream, around 2010/2011.
We as an industry tried like hell to fight, and it came with challenge, after challenge. Industry haters, attempting to shut business’ down, from the moment they smelt the competition just for one example. After all of the stories, close-calls, top floor board room meetings and wild experiences I ultimately exited the industry in 2019, officially. This was after successfully selling the bulk of my intellectual property (I.P.) and patents, to a well-known brand. If I would have stayed in the business, I would have had to chase down 1.2 billion dollars in funding, just to afford the “at the time”, mandated FDA’s pre-market tobacco applications for all of my 7’s branded products or SKU’s.
While that just barely scratches the surface of the battles I endured, my body started to give out, for unknown reasons at the time.
Fast forward to now. I have been looking for direction on what to write about but keep finding myself waiting for the “perfect environment” or motivation.
I recently came to the conclusion that I thought I was trying to find the perfect setup, instead of just using what I had which ultimately lead to my procrastination.
For example as to why, I started struggling more and more to visually see the computer screen. It’s worse out of my right eye compared to my left. I’m told that I have neurological related damage in my cornea, and unfortunately vision correction glasses or contacts is not something this can fix. So, the small 14″ laptop I had, was becoming increasingly difficult to see. I had to “scale up” the screen 2 levels more than the default just to be able to see and it’s quite uncomfortable to say the least. Writing this post, is still difficult with a larger screen and scaling but not impossible, yet. I’ll use voice-to-text if that’s what it eventually takes to keep writing.
Anyhow, finding a larger screen laptop, was and has proved to be helpful, for sure. I now have a 16″ laptop which makes a sizable difference for me. However, it’s not the laptop, that solved my environment dilemma. While it’s certainly a factor and after upgrading laptops this month, I’ve learned, it’s not my “desk setup” or “laptop” that I was lacking. It was actually my environment, and that includes not just the things around you, but the people as well. Situationally speaking, It’s been a few years since I’ve had to deal with the mess of the industry and I’m thankful for that. I wouldn’t change a thing if I had to relive it again. I made sacrifices, to save lives. That’s all I needed, to know I was doing the right thing.
Though, now it’s time to try and focus on my own health and body, because it’s quite angry at me. It’s taken a few years, and even some time in therapy to work through what I experienced in the past. Learning that it’s ok to not have to worry about making that next $60k in payroll for your employees by next Tuesday, or not worrying about backup business’ because you’re concerned about who’s knocking on the door next to try and shut your business down. In addition to carrying the weight in making sure I showed up for all of my employees who were also trying to provide for their families, I was simultaneously the sole bread winner for my home and had 3 children that I was aiming to provide a bright future for.
Exiting the electronic cigarette business in 2019, was one of the healthiest decisions I’ve ever made for myself, and for those around me. However. it wasn’t until my AFIB episode which landed me in the ER for a few days earlier this month – that I realized… it’s not that I am missing the perfect desk setup, or perfect computer, it was my inability to really let go. My inability to let go of “some control” with perfections and make decisions with what’s right in front of me, instead of creating the perfect scenario to be comfortable in. As part of being in the fight or flight, survival mode, I realized I don’t always need to worry about tomorrow or have everything perfect and ready the way it’s needs to be before proceeding. Sometimes starting is way more important than being ready.
To get here mentally, it was also about being in safe place, being able to focus on yourself, and more importantly, the people around you. I didn’t realize it until now but I finally feel safe, and cared for, and I feel like I can finally focus on myself, look deep down and write about what I feel. So now it’s time to document what I’ve experienced, what I know, and go from there. Especially before I lose any more capabilities to do so.
Regardless of one’s health conditions or limitations, we are all getting older, by the second. So let’s make sure every moment counts. Find or create your environment and protect it by only allowing those into it that serve you in return, so that you too can be your best for those around you.
You deserve it.
